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Post by Clotilde on May 16, 2016 21:27:02 GMT -5
Unfortunately, I am terrible with citing sources  I read a lot, but I rarely read books cover-to-cover. I also usually have multiple books going at one time, so I often have a hard time remembering exactly where I read various things. I also pick up little tidbits from online and IRL sermons, retreats, confessions, conversations with friends, etc. I'm not a well-versed theologian, and I don't play one on TV  . But, as to my point about accepting the fact that you can't make it to Mass being a source of grace, I didn't mean that in the sacramental/sanctifying grace sense. Really, you would only recieve sanctifying grace at Mass if you recieved Holy Communion, anyway, right? Only the sacraments themselves are channels for sanctifying grace (someome please correct me, if I am wrong there). If I went to daily Mass with all my kids, by myself, there's no way I would ever be properly disposed to receive the Eucharist. As it is, I have a hard time on Sundays, with my husband's help. So, I would only receive minimal graces, anyway. Honestly, it might be to my downfall to go, because I would end up irritated and frustrated that I wasn't able to pay attention....I would likely ruin any chance for receiving graces by my attitude. But, in recognizing that the duties in my state in life require me to stay home from daily Mass, I see that as abandonment to Divine Providence. St. Ignatius would call it "holy indifference", I think. There's a certain merit and grace that comes with accepting whatever comes along - good or bad - as being from God. Not that we should just sit around and do nothing, letting life just happen all around us, with no action on our part. But, whatever does come along that is beyond our control, we should do our best to handle with patience and a resignation to God's Will. So, if I'm in a phase in life where daily Mass (which isn't even a requirement) can't happen, then I should accept that as His Will, offer it up as a self-denial, and try really hard not to complain or be discouraged by it (saying that you wish you could attend Mass more often is not complaining, by the way....desiring to be with the one you love, depsite not being able to is hardly a complaint). If situations change, and daily Mass becomes doable, then I would make the effort to go, and thank God for the opportunity. As Job says, "the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord." My situation is similar but also different. At present, we are only able to get to mass once a year or so. When I was younger, I thought we would like near a church and have daily mass. I envisioned a "parish life" but now I know that is not what God has provided. I am totally resigned, and I cannot complain because I know that God allowed me to live in a time and place where I could best save my soul. All I need to do is persevere. I am doing my best and relying on the graces of the sacrament of marriage for the the rearing of the children, I draw daily from that refreshing well knowing God has provided and will provide me with everything I need. In the meantime, we have tried our best to co-operate with His Will and stay in the state of grace. We have prepared and do prepare our children for the world, yet tried to fortify their hearts and minds with what is True and Good, and have worked to build a Catholic culture in our home life. We give the best we have to offer and let Our Lady touch it up, as one of the books that I read to the children says. |
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Post by chestertonian on May 16, 2016 21:44:52 GMT -5
once a year...can'timavignee how that ...my wife and my son go to Masssyndays holy dayss i ask him to twll me what the sermon was about
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Post by Marya Dabrowski on May 17, 2016 23:31:21 GMT -5
Just want to add to what the others said.
When we see an ambulance we say a Hail Mary or Our Father for the people involved.
November is a really special time for us as we try to go to a cemetery everyday, weather permitting. The kids really like that. I know you're supposed to go to a Catholic cemetery but we go to whatever one is nearby at the time. We do the toties quoties and then later just the purgatory prayer...Eternal rest... It is better to go during the daylight as people wonder what you're doing there after dark.
We blow a candle out at breakfast after our very simple morning offering. No Morning offering, no candle. "O Jesus, I give you my day, all that I think and do and say."
I make a Lenten calendar each year. Every Monday is a certain penance (this year 10 minutes spiritual reading), every Tuesday something (3 Hail Marys), Wed. (clean an extra room), etc. We used to collect extra alms during lent using our calendar but I don't know if we'll do that again.
We do processions at home to crown Mary statues and put Baby Jesus in his manger.
We host a Saint's Party.
One thing I've noticed is that some children really are into the religious things we do and others have to be drug in to participate. Hope these help.
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Post by chestertonian on May 18, 2016 8:58:42 GMT -5
we do the ambulance thing too
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Post by mundacormeum on May 18, 2016 12:37:52 GMT -5
Unfortunately, I am terrible with citing sources I read a lot, but I rarely read books cover-to-cover. I also usually have multiple books going at one time, so I often have a hard time remembering exactly where I read various things. I also pick up little tidbits from online and IRL sermons, retreats, confessions, conversations with friends, etc. I'm not a well-versed theologian, and I don't play one on TV . But, as to my point about accepting the fact that you can't make it to Mass being a source of grace, I didn't mean that in the sacramental/sanctifying grace sense. Really, you would only recieve sanctifying grace at Mass if you recieved Holy Communion, anyway, right? Only the sacraments themselves are channels for sanctifying grace (someome please correct me, if I am wrong there). If I went to daily Mass with all my kids, by myself, there's no way I would ever be properly disposed to receive the Eucharist. As it is, I have a hard time on Sundays, with my husband's help. So, I would only receive minimal graces, anyway. Honestly, it might be to my downfall to go, because I would end up irritated and frustrated that I wasn't able to pay attention....I would likely ruin any chance for receiving graces by my attitude. But, in recognizing that the duties in my state in life require me to stay home from daily Mass, I see that as abandonment to Divine Providence. St. Ignatius would call it "holy indifference", I think. There's a certain merit and grace that comes with accepting whatever comes along - good or bad - as being from God. Not that we should just sit around and do nothing, letting life just happen all around us, with no action on our part. But, whatever does come along that is beyond our control, we should do our best to handle with patience and a resignation to God's Will. So, if I'm in a phase in life where daily Mass (which isn't even a requirement) can't happen, then I should accept that as His Will, offer it up as a self-denial, and try really hard not to complain or be discouraged by it (saying that you wish you could attend Mass more often is not complaining, by the way....desiring to be with the one you love, depsite not being able to is hardly a complaint). If situations change, and daily Mass becomes doable, then I would make the effort to go, and thank God for the opportunity. As Job says, "the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord." i wish I had that disposituin it is difficult for me not to see as God making it impossible for me to go to church because He does not want me in Gis presence (or n aheaven bo less I wish I always had that disposition, too . Knowing how I should act, and actually doing so are two different things. It doesn't come easy, and many times I fail completely; and I have plenty of doubts and confusion, as well. But, that's part of it. We aren't supposed to fully understand everything here on earth. If your son doubted your love for him, and accused you of doing terrible things to him on purpose, just to keep him away from you, simply because you didn't want to be in his presence.....woudn't that make you very sad? its not easy to understand God's ways, especially when it comes to suffering. And, I'm guessing your own particualr situation makes it even harder than most. But, I'm quite sure God doesn't feel that way about people, including you. heres a link to the book, 'Abandonment to Divine Providence': www.catholicspiritualdirection.org/abandonment.pdfwhat little I've read so far is very good, and seems to cover some of the things you are questioning. |
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Post by Voxxkowalski on May 18, 2016 15:45:21 GMT -5
This isn't a family thing but Ive gotten into the habit of saying Hail Marys for folks I see as I drive and go about my business who seem to be in some kind of bad way (obviously upset cig smoking mother at bus stop with little kid-man driving those little three wheel things you see in grocery stores on the side of the road-person in a broke down car...etc)
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Post by Clotilde on May 18, 2016 18:39:28 GMT -5
once a year...can'timavignee how that ...my wife and my son go to Masssyndays holy dayss i ask him to twll me what the sermon was about I have access to old priests for confession. I have much happiness in resignation to what God has provided. I try not to be so imaginative these days with regards to what I want, but rather focus on being thankful and perseverence. |
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Post by chestertonian on May 19, 2016 17:35:16 GMT -5
i wish I had that disposituin it is difficult for me not to see as God making it impossible for me to go to church because He does not want me in Gis presence (or n aheaven bo less I wish I always had that disposition, too . Knowing how I should act, and actually doing so are two different things. It doesn't come easy, and many times I fail completely; and I have plenty of doubts and confusion, as well. But, that's part of it. We aren't supposed to fully understand everything here on earth. If your son doubted your love for him, and accused you of doing terrible things to him on purpose, just to keep him away from you, simply because you didn't want to be in his presence.....woudn't that make you very sad? its not easy to understand God's ways, especially when it comes to suffering. And, I'm guessing your own particualr situation makes it even harder than most. But, I'm quite sure God doesn't feel that way about people, including you. heres a link to the book, 'Abandonment to Divine Providence': www.catholicspiritualdirection.org/abandonment.pdfwhat little I've read so far is very good, and seems to cover some of the things you are questioning. its hard to say. i dont really put my son through what God puts some souls through or put him in situations where he cannot be near me for long periods. annd i genuinnely love to be in his presence sometimes i think i have figured out a way to make sense of suffering and then, thngs change and i have to figure it out again. there are graces in attending mass even if youdont receive i think |
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Post by mundacormeum on May 20, 2016 12:48:50 GMT -5
Just want to add to what the others said. When we see an ambulance we say a Hail Mary or Our Father for the people involved. November is a really special time for us as we try to go to a cemetery everyday, weather permitting. The kids really like that. I know you're supposed to go to a Catholic cemetery but we go to whatever one is nearby at the time. We do the toties quoties and then later just the purgatory prayer...Eternal rest... It is better to go during the daylight as people wonder what you're doing there after dark. We blow a candle out at breakfast after our very simple morning offering. No Morning offering, no candle. "O Jesus, I give you my day, all that I think and do and say." I make a Lenten calendar each year. Every Monday is a certain penance (this year 10 minutes spiritual reading), every Tuesday something (3 Hail Marys), Wed. (clean an extra room), etc. We used to collect extra alms during lent using our calendar but I don't know if we'll do that again. We do processions at home to crown Mary statues and put Baby Jesus in his manger. We host a Saint's Party. One thing I've noticed is that some children really are into the religious things we do and others have to be drug in to participate. Hope these help. These are are all excellent ideas. We do an All Saints' Party with our homeschool group, and also do a special family celebration with just us at home. There are some great ideas I picked up from the Catholice Cultured website. your Lenten calendar sounds great, too. My kids and I love lighting candles at prayers, but it kind of stresses my husband a little, because the kids are so young, and matchsticks and wax get everywhere. So, we compromise by only lighting them at the family Rosary. They gave me some incense sticks and a box, which we now light at the Rosary, too. I really liked it. I want to start collecting candle stick holders and candles from secondhand stores, so I'll have them ready for when the kids are older, and less inclined to play with matches and wax (does that ever actually happen??) |
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Post by mundacormeum on May 20, 2016 12:52:08 GMT -5
I wish I always had that disposition, too . Knowing how I should act, and actually doing so are two different things. It doesn't come easy, and many times I fail completely; and I have plenty of doubts and confusion, as well. But, that's part of it. We aren't supposed to fully understand everything here on earth. If your son doubted your love for him, and accused you of doing terrible things to him on purpose, just to keep him away from you, simply because you didn't want to be in his presence.....woudn't that make you very sad? its not easy to understand God's ways, especially when it comes to suffering. And, I'm guessing your own particualr situation makes it even harder than most. But, I'm quite sure God doesn't feel that way about people, including you. heres a link to the book, 'Abandonment to Divine Providence': www.catholicspiritualdirection.org/abandonment.pdfwhat little I've read so far is very good, and seems to cover some of the things you are questioning. its hard to say. i dont really put my son through what God puts some souls through or put him in situations where he cannot be near me for long periods. annd i genuinnely love to be in his presence sometimes i think i have figured out a way to make sense of suffering and then, thngs change and i have to figure it out again. there are graces in attending mass even if youdont receive i thinkof course....I completely agree. There are also graces in offering up the disappointment of not being able to attend Mass (through no fault of your own), even though you would really like too, as well, I think. ETA: I don't think we are supposed to have it all figured out and have perfect understanding of everything on this side of Heaven. It's called the valley of tears for a reason. The fact that you don't have things figured out all the time is not a sign that you are doing something wrong. The fact that you continue striving, despite your frustration and confusion is a sign you are doing something right. If we had it all figured out, we wouldn't need God, faith, or the Church. |
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Post by Marya Dabrowski on May 22, 2016 6:34:17 GMT -5
Just want to add to what the others said. When we see an ambulance we say a Hail Mary or Our Father for the people involved. November is a really special time for us as we try to go to a cemetery everyday, weather permitting. The kids really like that. I know you're supposed to go to a Catholic cemetery but we go to whatever one is nearby at the time. We do the toties quoties and then later just the purgatory prayer...Eternal rest... It is better to go during the daylight as people wonder what you're doing there after dark. We blow a candle out at breakfast after our very simple morning offering. No Morning offering, no candle. "O Jesus, I give you my day, all that I think and do and say." I make a Lenten calendar each year. Every Monday is a certain penance (this year 10 minutes spiritual reading), every Tuesday something (3 Hail Marys), Wed. (clean an extra room), etc. We used to collect extra alms during lent using our calendar but I don't know if we'll do that again. We do processions at home to crown Mary statues and put Baby Jesus in his manger. We host a Saint's Party. One thing I've noticed is that some children really are into the religious things we do and others have to be drug in to participate. Hope these help. These are are all excellent ideas. We do an All Saints' Party with our homeschool group, and also do a special family celebration with just us at home. There are some great ideas I picked up from the Catholice Cultured website. your Lenten calendar sounds great, too. My kids and I love lighting candles at prayers, but it kind of stresses my husband a little, because the kids are so young, and matchsticks and wax get everywhere. So, we compromise by only lighting them at the family Rosary. They gave me some incense sticks and a box, which we now light at the Rosary, too. I really liked it. I want to start collecting candle stick holders and candles from secondhand stores, so I'll have them ready for when the kids are older, and less inclined to play with matches and wax (does that ever actually happen??) My children have each gone through a stage where they are really into fire. They want to light the candles and burn the garbage everyday. It does past. If there is any goofing around with matches, they get taken away for a month or two or three. |
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I read a lot, but I rarely read books cover-to-cover. I also usually have multiple books going at one time, so I often have a hard time remembering exactly where I read various things. I also pick up little tidbits from online and IRL sermons, retreats, confessions, conversations with friends, etc. I'm not a well-versed theologian, and I don't play one on TV 
. But, as to my point about accepting the fact that you can't make it to Mass being a source of grace, I didn't mean that in the sacramental/sanctifying grace sense. Really, you would only recieve sanctifying grace at Mass if you recieved Holy Communion, anyway, right? Only the sacraments themselves are channels for sanctifying grace (someome please correct me, if I am wrong there). If I went to daily Mass with all my kids, by myself, there's no way I would ever be properly disposed to receive the Eucharist. As it is, I have a hard time on Sundays, with my husband's help. So, I would only receive minimal graces, anyway. Honestly, it might be to my downfall to go, because I would end up irritated and frustrated that I wasn't able to pay attention....I would likely ruin any chance for receiving graces by my attitude. But, in recognizing that the duties in my state in life require me to stay home from daily Mass, I see that as abandonment to Divine Providence. St. Ignatius would call it "holy indifference", I think. There's a certain merit and grace that comes with accepting whatever comes along - good or bad - as being from God. Not that we should just sit around and do nothing, letting life just happen all around us, with no action on our part. But, whatever does come along that is beyond our control, we should do our best to handle with patience and a resignation to God's Will. So, if I'm in a phase in life where daily Mass (which isn't even a requirement) can't happen, then I should accept that as His Will, offer it up as a self-denial, and try really hard not to complain or be discouraged by it (saying that you wish you could attend Mass more often is not complaining, by the way....desiring to be with the one you love, depsite not being able to is hardly a complaint). If situations change, and daily Mass becomes doable, then I would make the effort to go, and thank God for the opportunity. As Job says, "the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord." 
